Sunday, August 18, 2013

I [Hate] the "Now," Part Deux!

I posted last year about the degradation of language, but things have gotten worse from 2012 to 2013. I have observed many mutations in the human language since last year:
2012, there was omg, wtf, rofl, lmao, lol, etc. 2013, there is a new trend: abbreviation.

I guess text acronyms weren't enough for the teenage mind to minimalistically limit their communication to the bare minimum. I was talking to a temporary coworker I work with at 0400 to 1000 hours, and we were talking about religion, I'm LDS (one belonging to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints or "Mormon"), he is also Mormon but he puts his Mormon face on just for Sundays. A few days back he asked me, "So are you going on a mish?"
"Mush?" I replied.
"Mish! Like Mormon Mish!" He said.
"You mean 'mission.'" I retorted

It struck me like a hammer on an anvil: teenagers are now taking normal words and abbreviating them to fit their weed riddled brains. So I asked him why he saw it fit to abbreviate a really easy word. He said, "It is just easier to say! Like 'stead of me callin' you 'Lucas,' I would call you 'Luke.'"
"Lucas is my name, only my close friends have the audacity to call me Luke." I thought.
Say "mission," out loud. Do you notice how the word just slides off the tongue, "Mish-uhn." Is it really necessary to abbreviate such a simple word? Now this isn't the only word I disdain.

I found this funny at first and then I became aggravated when every other 14 year-old used it in there incomplete sentences. "That party last night was CRAYCRAY!" Alright, raise your hand if your parents ever said to you, "Use your words!" when you were trying to get something by sounding like a baby.
"Alright teenage babies, USE YOUR WORDS!"
Crazy is not a hard word to say, and if you analyze each vowel and consonant sound it is a very fun word. But teenagers still find a way to cause William Shakespeare to churn in his grave.

Correct me if I am wrong, but to "tote" as in "to carry" or "tote" as in a "tote bag." But nowadays humans are using "totes" extremely incorrectly. "That party last night was TOTES fun!" Was there a gift exchange? Were there tote bags involved? Oh, you mean totally! Sorry, I just supposed that your parents taught you to fully emphasize your words. Now, you may be saying, "Lucas, you sound like a griping old man! What is your problem?"
If I ended up as a school teacher I would be the Stalin of English. I am merely concerned for the future of communication. But alas, I am not done!

Alright the cherry on top of the overcooked cake of Americanized English. Remember that cereal that came out in the 90's? Pops. Or the name you would give you father? Pops. "That party last night was awesome, I was very POPS!" Excuse me, did you just call yourself the father of the party? Popular. I am unamused.
Granted "popular" is a somewhat long word, but why buy a foot-long Subway sandwich if you are only going to take 3 bites out of it? Use your words.


Please, for the sake of evolution, use words while you have them! Some people are undereducated, and wish they could use words like "popular," "crazy," and "totally."


P.s. What the crap does RVCA stand for?

1 comment:

  1. I was Just rolling on the floor laughing my @*^%% off. Oh My Gosh!!! People really should use their words. I totally agree that it is a crazy thing to do but by utilizing a heightened education will ultimately result in a state of popularity much greater than you could ever fathom. Laugh out loud!!